Motorcycle apocalypse survival guide

If the world ended tomorrow, what would you do? With the way things are going, it’s a good idea to have at least one bug-out plan. Bikesure, takes a look at what you need to know about you and your bike surviving some of the most popular end of civilisation scenarios.

Of course a lot of these idle fantasies are predicated on you being one of the survivors of the event. This is the largest hurdle you’ll have to overcome, but we’re going to assume that you did, otherwise this will be a very short article. 

Your survival strategy will have to be tailored to the precise nature of the disaster. Zombie apocalypses have inspired countless movies and TV shows, with most taking their cue from the classic Night of the Living Dead to some degree or another, despite the word zombie never being uttered in that film. Regardless, the idea that you’ll be facing slow, shambling zombies is the standard scenario, but you should probably have strategies if you find yourself dealing with variations such as the smart zombies from Return of the Living Dead or the fast zombies from 28 Days Later. 

Mad Max is also a vital text to study in terms of surviving the total collapse of civilisation with the help of internal combustion vehicles, for obvious reasons. Of course these show the end stages of the fight for diminishing supplies of resources, but the basic idea that whoever controls the petrol will have both an awful lot of power over others and a giant target on their back is vitally important.

Other issues that could emerge as time goes on include increased infections and diseases, which if the cause of the zombies is a virus or infection it could get extremely nasty, animals going feral and forming giant packs hunting survivors, survivors going feral and hunting the giant packs of animals, and as the power infrastructure goes unmonitored you might want to steer clear of nuclear power stations. Obviously, a good insurance policy would help out a great deal in this scenario, but while Bikesure is confident about their ability to keep you and your bike running smoothly pre-apocalypse, things might be tougher afterwards. 

But we want to keep our beloved customers safe, so while you may find other articles about surviving zombie based disasters with your motorcycle out on the internet, we noticed they’re all pretty light on actual workable survival plans. Not ours though. This is the only article that tells you the best motorcycles to make it through an extinction level event, but also how to get them and how to survive. And that is why we’re the best motorcycle insurance company in the game. Believe.

Then again, in all honesty, insurance isn’t going to be at the forefront of your mind in such a scenario. But stick with us just for the sake of this article…

So after the disaster strikes and it’s clear things are going rapidly south, moving to secure supplies of petrol will be a vital part of your survival plan. 

Mad Max suggests a way forward for motorcycle favourers in the afterscape, which is co-operation. In Fury Road two groups use motorcycles, mountain dwellers who use the landscape to their advantage and the nomadic many mothers, who rely on the manoeuvrability bikes afford them to stay hidden. Both groups have realised working together as a team greatly increases their chances against the car or truck drivers, and the same will apply to you too. 

Mad Max could be a helpful text to study as part of your research.

But what exactly are the best bikes for surviving the post collapse? 

Many lists will focus on off-road or adventure bikes and there’s some good logic there, especially as roads begin to deteriorate, but many of the best bikes are only available in small quantities and in limited numbers. The best thing to do will be to secure something dependable and mass market for a daily transport, and then, in all honesty, a giant truck to put it in for the global road trip you are about to undertake in order to rescue the best post apocalypse motorcycles.

KTM

This is a great brand to aim for in the early stages of your bike gathering mission, being relatively easily available and with access to spares almost certainly not too difficult to secure. Of course you will be at risk if the dealership is in or near a population centre, so you’ll need to be careful and stealthy. This is why a truck would come in handy – space to store your pre-gathered petrol and/or tools, space to carry your new bikes without having to worry about attracting the attention of the zombies. But what should you pick? Well, why not treat yourself to one of the special limited editions like the 2019 450 sx-f Herlings Replica. Boom, you’ve got your first bike. But where next? Oh, hang on, before you go and if you do care about insurance you may want to consider getting Green Card cover for your adventures. It may be handy if you get stopped at any of the borders. 

Lazareth

Check out Lazereth, a garage that builds high end custom bikes.

 

Given civilisation as we know it has ended, you might as well treat yourself to all the good stuff you’d never have been able to afford. Lazareth are some French high end custom garage who build incredibly high end bikes that would mark you out as one of the most stylish bikers in the wastelands. They also made a flying motorcycle, which is obviously a bit of a gimmick but come on, you’re not going to find space for that on your truck? Of course you are. The next leg of the tour should be quite pretty, what with going through Switzerland and its gigantic tunnels. Again, if you are giving a **** about insurance, just make sure all those mods are declared when you take out any policy… 

Summer

Your destination is Germany, specifically Geyern just south of Nuremberg. This is where you’ll find the Summer factory. These diesel powered motorcycles have found themselves on many survival lists, despite their bespoke, extremely limited availability. This is really just to make sure you have options, in case you’re able to find sources of diesel in times of petrol shortages. Not that it isn’t a good bike, and it’s a bit more practical than the flying motorcycle. By the way, you now have quite a collection going on, perhaps it’s time to consider a Bikesure multibike policy? Of course, that’s if you still believe insurance is important in such a scenario… If that’s the case, what a responsible person you are…   

Peraves 

A Peraves Monoracer should provide a little extra protection if you enter other zombie-heavy areas.

Talking of practical, you’ve presumably been pretty lucky to make it this far, but that doesn’t mean you should let your guard down. The next stop on the journey should help provide a bit of extra security for certain trips. The good news is this is a relatively short leg, from Geyern to Brno in the Czech Republic. Here you’ll be getting a Peraves Monoracer, which is a cabin motorcycle that should provide a little extra protection if you need to enter cities or other zombie-heavy areas. It’s also available in electric, which much like the diesel bike could well be a useful extra variation to cover any eventualities. Anyway! We’re almost at the end of the mission, but this is going to be the toughest part yet. It’s time to go… to Russia. Again, don’t panic about insurance, our Green Card cover can even include Russia. What a journey this is turning out to be…  

Tarus

Tarus build absurdly rugged all terrain motorcycles, but they’re only sold within Russia….

As time goes on, infrastructure will begin crumbling making off-road bikes far more useful. Tarus build absurdly rugged all terrain motorcycles, but they’re only sold within Russia so to get one you’re going to have to trek from the Czech Republic, through Poland, Belarus and Russia itself to Kaluga, just south of Moscow. Simple. Once you’re there, you’ll have a collection of motorcycles that should enable you to cover most of the situations you’ll find yourself in, but what now? 

You’ve made it all the way across Europe, avoiding the zombie hordes unscathed, and you’re now thousands of miles away from home with a truck full of motorcycles. In many ways the world is your oyster, although in real terms your options are: return home, head north or keep going east. Home option is relatively self-explanatory, although that does generally turn out to be a bad idea in zombie fiction so we’ll reject it for now. North in Russia basically means you’re going to head out into the largely unpopulated arctic tundra. 

Which leaves us with east: Russia is gigantic and largely unpopulated making it relatively easy to set up a secure compound. But you’ve now got a truck full of bikes to consider, so why not get a bit more adventurous and set up somewhere in eastern Kazakhstan or Mongolia? Or if you’re really up for continued adventures, go all the way to the Alaskan gap and head over to America to continue your search for the rarest motorcycles. Which will be fairly tense, but at least you’ll have plenty of options for your motorcycle trips!

And if your policy hasn’t quite covered you, call Bikesure (if we still exist). We may have a team of advisers who could offer a bespoke solution and pull a few strings for you. 

Have we missed anything out? What would be your bug out disaster motorcycle, and where would you establish your hideout? Sound off in the comments below, unless you want to keep your choices a secret of course.

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August 8, 2023

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